Edward's life as a 13 year old girl
by alicecullenrocks888
Summary: This is basically a humor story, very OOC, but it's funny ; Read it if you love to laugh ; Rated T, but some chapters may be M. In third person POV   WARNING: Some Edward Cullen fans may find this offensive!


**A/N: Hello y'all we're(Aby and Nicole) back and this is another humor story(; Rated M cause there'll probably be swearing. I'm just going to explain briefly *ish* about this.**

**EXPLANATION: Each chapter is based on events that have happened in our life. Since our friends and we are all named after a twilight character, this is really what happens every day. And, just as a heads up, this is taking place in Singapore, and we just stay in one classroom the whole day(; The following is the casting.**

**Edward-Nathalie Ng**

**Alice-Nicole**

**Rosalie-Chelsea**

**Renesmee-Aby**

**(Other additional, not so important, characters that will sometimes appear in the stories)**

**Jacob-Muddyy**

**Bella-Syaza**

**Mirl-Kylie. (Okay, Mirl is not a twilight character; it's a combination of man and girl. Nevertheless, she/he is very important to this story)**

**Summary: Edward Cullen's life as a 13-year old gay vampire. Living in Singapore(;**

**This story is very OOC(; Especially Alice. Alice is really mean here**** And it's all in 3****rd**** person. Rated M for swearing. Now that all of that's cleared up, ENJOY!**

**Disclaimer: We do not own Twilight.**

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The sun was about to start shining as Edward Cullen got ready for school. He ate his breakfast, knowing he was going to puke it up soon anyway. He wore his school blouse and skirt.

He left the house at about 6:30 to take the public bus to school. It was a Friday, and the next day was a Saturday. Finally, he could sleep in!

Bus number 111 arrived and he climbed on. Plugging in his earphones, he tuned out the world.

A random Korean song started playing.

_Run, run, run, run_

After about five minutes, all the people in the bus started to glare at him.

_What?_ He said, mentally. People who were asleep, woke up and glared. Through his earphones, he could hear more Korean music.

_That's such a nice song,_ he thought.

Then he realized, it was his phone! He freaked out, and squeaked like a little girl. He pulled his phone out his bag and picked it up.

As he got off the bus, all the people glared at him until he left. Feeling extremely subconscious, he walked up the slope to his school, Saffron Girls' School.

Why was he in a girls' school, might you ask? Well, I shall explain it to you. Here's a memory that will help.

_The students are all filing out of the assembly hall._

"_Where's Alice?" Renesmee asked._

"_I don't know!" Rosalie replied._

"_Well, she'd be the shortest here, wouldn't she?" Renesmee said._

"_Yeah, but everybody's wearing the same thing here! We're all in the same yellow blouse and green skirt, practically all of us have our hair tied up, we're all wearing shoes, and socks…" Rosalie trailed._

"_And we're all girls," Renesmee said helpfully. Rosalie nodded._

_There was a long pause._

"_Yeaaaaaaaaaah…" Edward said._

"_What took you so long to answer?" Renesmee said curiously._

"_OH MY GOD YOU'RE NOT A GIRL?" Rosalie yelled dramatically._

Basically, that was how Edward Cullen, the gay vampire came to be in Saffron Girls' School.

As it was a Friday, all students had to run FITT run. Basically, 4 rounds around the school. Nobody was looking forward to it.

"Hello Edward," the Mirl said seductively as soon as Edward stepped in the room. Edward was desk partners with the Mirl.

"Ew, oh my god, go away!" Edward shrieked.

The Mirl laughed provocatively and went away. She was just doing that to wind dear Eddy up.

"Everybody, line up outside!" the class rep yelled. Everyone stripped off their blouse and skirt, revealing their PE attire underneath.

"Ugh, I so don't wanna run FITT run. Alice always ditches me, and Rosalie is just unnaturally fast on purpose! It's so unfair that you guys have super speed and never get tired." Renesmee complained.

"Run with Eddy then," Rosalie offered helpfully.

"But eddy's so slow!" Renesmee whined again.

Alice turned around and stuck her tongue out.

"You're such a mean aunt, Alice," Renesmee grumbled.

Alice ignored that comment, even though it was perfectly true.

After FITT run, the four Cullens returned to the classroom with the rest of their class. Everybody pulled on their blouse and skirt.

"_WHERE IS MY SKIRT?" _Edward suddenly yelled.

As usual, she was ignored.

"_Dude!"_ he shrieked in that high-pitched girly voice.

Renesmee turned. She was the only one who heard Eddy because her seat was right next to Edward's.

"What?" she asked.

"_I lost my skirt!"_

**A/N: How'd you like it? Pretty short huh. Next chapter shall be longer, IF YOU REVIEW!**


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